Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Appointments

I went yesterday to meet with a lawyer.  I burst in tears once I got back in my van.  I felt like a number ... next!  Like he was just rushing me and basically told me that my best option was to let the house go into foreclosure, just file for bankruptcy, save money and then move.
 
I am not ok with that option.  I don't think my situation is that bad.  I have heard horror stories in which, after all, the people are able to keep their homes.  So that is what I am aiming for.
 
I have called my bank through out the day today with no luck since their system is down. 
 
And I feel that I can't just sit and wait, I have to do something.
 
So I am meeting with another lawyer from another law firm tomorrow afternoon.
 
And we'll see....

Monday, February 21, 2011

Home

There is something very, very personal that I have been debating whether to blog about it or not.

Life is funny, you know?  I am like, the best person that you can pick to see all the positives in your life, to push you in the right direction, to make you feel that everything will be alright.

I can't do it for myself.

I found out a week or so ago that apparently they have started foreclosure procedures on my house.  My home.  

I went today to meet with a lawyer that basically told me that my best bet is to just let it go into foreclosure, save up in the meantime, and then start anew renting property.  

That is not the answer I wanted to hear.

I have been dealing with feelings of failure, not being good enough, you name it ... my rational self knows that this should not be a reflection on me as a person, a lot of people are going through hard times these days ... but then I guess what they say is true, we are our worst judge.

Tomorrow I am calling the bank again to see if there is a possibility of a loan modification.  I will also contact another law firm that deals with foreclosures and bankruptcies.  And then I guess I will have to make some hard decisions.

Sunday, February 20, 2011

Miracle

Last week, at the kiddo's RCIA class, they asked if they knew the definition of a miracle.  G's hand went straight up and I looked at him thinking "what is he going to say now."  The teacher looked at me (I sit with him in these classes) and I just shrugged my shoulders, I had no idea what he was going to say.

So this is what he says ... all the time smiling 'cause he was so proud he got picked to answer first ... and he said "a miracle is when something really, really, really awesome, that never happened before, happens" and after he said that, he just smiled ... a happy, wide smile ... he was so proud of himself ... and so was I.

He is that something really really really awesome that never happened before.