Tuesday, May 26, 2009

20 yrs

today marks 20 yrs that we moved to the US of A ... 20 friggin' yrs!

when we first moved here - we being my parents, sis and I - we moved to a relative's house in Longwood, one of the cities close to Orlando ... what I remember most of that day was the ride to the house from the airport... for some reason, everytime I drive down that road, I remember that day

sometimes I wonder what life would have been for me had I decided - against my parents' wishes - to stay in Puerto Rico (I was 19 at the time, yeah, do the math, am friggin' 39 yrs old, lol)... only sometimes though... I love my island but I like it here and this is home now

last summer I went to my high school's 20th yr reunion and even though it was great to see everyone... I felt like a fish out of water... I had a great time there, don't get me wrong, but that wasn't my home anymore... it was kind of bittersweet to me

in the past 20 yrs I got my bachelor's degree, bought my first (and second) car, bought my own home, got married, had a son, got divorced and have kept my job with the local government for the past 15 yrs (and counting!) ... now I am thinking, what about the next 20 yrs of my life? what am I going to do with those?

to help clarify and make changes I am now reading, not one, not two but three books (is a habit I have, can't read just one at a time, is that bad?, lol)

these are the books I am reading now.... The Dream Giver by Bruce Wilkinson, What Happy Women Know by Dan Baker and Cathy Greenberg and The First 30 days by Ariane de Bonvoisin. The first one I got it as a Christmas gift from my sis and the last two I bought at the Florida Conference for Women I attended on May 12th (that is a post that I have to write later, very empowering day!)

the key now is to find the time to read... ha! laters!

Friday, May 22, 2009

the secret club

last night I had the most interesting conversation with my kid... it went something like this...

my kid: mami, did I tell you that I have a secret club?

me: a secret club?

my kid: yeah mami, a secret club

me: so what is a secret club?

my kid: a club that is secret and we talk about secret stuff mami, duh! (how dumb of me to even ask!, lol)

me: right... so where is this secret club?

my kid: at school of course, all my secret members are friends from school (and he proceeded to tell me all the names of the secret members - all five of them, lol)

me: so you guys hide somewhere or have like a secret place to talk?

my kid: no mami we just sit in a circle and you can only go in the circle if you know the secret handshake

me: a secret handshake? why?

my kid: mami, duh! everyone KNOWS that a secret club has a secret handshake that only the secret members know! (at this time I was just covering my mouth to stop me from cracking up 'cause he was SERIOUS when he told me that long @ss line! LOL)

me: so can you show me the secret handshake?

my kid: (big sigh!, LOL!, and he goes) ok ok mami, I will but you can't tell NOBODY, OK?!

he then showed me and I am just telling you all this to tell you that... I can't show it to you! ok? lol

ps. this was just too cute NOT to share .... shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Thursday, May 21, 2009

amor

... this is something that I wrote about 2-3 yrs ago ... it is in Spanish as that is my first language

amor triste
amor chiquito
amor cobarde
amor muerto

ilusiones muertas
ilusiones rotas
ilusiones de algo que pudo ser tan grande

como una semilla
que no la enterraron
lo suficientemente hondo para poder crecer

pero gracias a
tu amor triste
tu amor chiquito
tu amor cobarde
tu amor muerto

encontre el mas grande amor
el amor a mi misma
a mi persona
a mi cuerpo
a mi mente
a mi alma

y ahora cuando te veo
solo me das pena

pq sigo viendo
un amor triste
un amor chiquito
un amor cobarde
y un amor muerto

solo tu puedes hacer que ese amor crezca en ti
y ojala un dia puedas entenderlo y lograrlo

dedicado a mi ex