Four Years

Tomorrow marks four years.  Four years since you died ma'.  I still feel like I am in a bubble when it comes to that fact.  Like it didn't happen, like it wasn't even possible ... yet it did happen.

I think of the three of us ... I am the one that has accepted it best ... pops still misses you and talks about you like you are in the next room.  Sis ... well you were the only one that truly understood her so yeah, she misses you tons.  My kid I guess is like me, he accepted it and does remember you but not like my nephew ... oh that one is just like his mother ... so dramatic.  He brings you up all the time and it makes them (pops and sis) ache and miss you even more.  

But who am I to judge them?  their pain?  I really don't.  I hope I don't come across like I do 'cause I don't.  I truly think that you are in a better place and you would not be happy to know that they haven't been able to move on from you.

I hope that what truly tells others about you is me and who I am.  Because I am the product of you.  And I hope that in doing that, people will say that I had a great mom.  Because, I truly did.

I love you.  I miss you.